Note: The following is intentional humor, given that this week's festival is a lighthearted and joyous occasion. While this blog demonstrates that I am perfectly capable of being Very Serious, I think that of late it's being forgotten that I also have a sense of humor, and the following is intended to re-establish that, as well as to answer the challenge of a child of a Cat who dared me to do it...
This is the way my cats tell the myth of this week's festival, the Establishment of the Celestial Cow, to each other....
Cuz teh d00dz r ebil, Ceiling Cat finked 2 leaf Erfs 4 gud.
He wented 2 finds His babeh gurl Nut.
She wuz nah angreh kitteh nomore (She stoppd aftr nomming teh d00dz an drinkin berz) but cow formz. srs.
An Ceiling Cat sed 2 teh kitteh-cow: "Ohai! im on ur bak, lightin ur skiez and stuffs. Nao wut?"
Den w00t! Cow iz skiez!!!1!!
Ceiling Cat sed: "go way from teh d00dz 2 see dem moar good kthx."
An Ceiling Cat's cow goed up highs.
Den She sed: "lookit meh an make meh MANEHS!" (Cos goeding up highs r boring.)
An sweet! Stars!!!1!!! srsly.
Den Ceiling Cat teh Graet sed: "i liek it heer. iz nice." An He namd dat place Sekhet-Hotep cuz it mented "nice heer" in Gyptshun.
But it wuz 2 high ups, an Ceiling Cat's cow startd 2 shaek cuz She wuz frayed ov teh hights, onoes!
Ceiling Cat sed: "plz 2 halp cow not fall down, godz? kthx." Den four godz come an holds her feets.
Read about how cats speak to each other here.